The Dirty Dash Recap
We parked at a Walmart, where Daniel had to run inside to buy tennis shoes (I wasn’t about to let him wear his nice running shoes!) and a cheap sweatshirt for me (I was still freezing at 11:30am). A shuttle (AKA super old school bus) met us in the parking lot to take us to the race site.
By the time we got there, it was almost time for our heat, so we checked our bags in as quickly as possible and headed to the starting line. A super lame deejay was throwing bags of colored powder into the crowd and trying to hype us up. Despite the lame deejay, we were pumped. We were surrounded by teams in tutus, construction worker, and Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle costumes.
About 2 feet over the starting line was our first mud pit. When the race started, I trudged straight into the pit right behind Daniel and just as I was about to step out, Anthony grabbed and pulled me back into the pit. Less than a minute into the race, and I was covered with mud from head to toe! I stood back up and tried to crawl out of the pit and slid right back in. Again. And again. And suddenly, I was the last one in the pit. I don’t think I would have ever gotten out if it hadn’t been for Dawn coming back and pulling me up! The crowd at the starting line cheered for me and the guys were laughing at me when I finally emerged. I will forever blame Anthony. 
The second mud pit was about 100 yards up and Dawn, Anthony, and Daniel slid into the pit on their bellies, losing their race numbers in the process. I, however, was already bleeding, so I walked around that particular pit, opting instead to offer my hand and help them get back out of the slippery depths.
Dawn and I jogged for a bit (with my shorts slipping down with every step from the weight of the mud) until we came to the next obstacle – a cargo net. You had to climb up the net, about 30 feet high, over the top, and down the other sides. I am not typically afraid of heights, but at the top of that net, I was shaking like a leaf! My hands were slipping off the ropes and the net shifted anytime anyone else on it moved. One guy offered to help me over, which was super sweet, but I ended up making it up, down, and over unscathed! Dawn shimmied up and down that thing like it was nothing, as did Daniel.
There were walls to climb over, monkey bars to cross, big pipes to crawl through, littler pipes to climb over and under. Daniel was hilarious on the over-under pipes! He would stand up, climb over a pipe, then hurl himself into the water to go under the next one. He did that through all of the pipes – you can see his head splashing down beside me in this photo! We skipped a few obstacles on the course, but Dawn was a beast, scaling walls like a champ and pushing me to jog when all I wanted to do was slow down!
There were a few long stretches without obstacles that got a little boring, but even walking is more challenging when you’re covered in mud – our clothes felt 50 pounds heavier, our feet slid around in our shoes and crunched our toes, and the mud on the soles of our feet made it hard to get any traction to keep our footing.
Daniel’s favorite obstacle of the day was the slop ‘n’ slide – he even walked back up the hill to slide down it again! That’s Dawn launching herself down the slide with me running behind her.
The race isn’t timed, so we really weren’t too concerned with our speed. When there was a mud pit, we’d stop and fling mud at each other, push each other into the squishy water, and make sure all four of us were thoroughly re-mud-covered before we moved on.
The final mud pit was huge and there was a crowd around it chanting, “Jump! Jump! Jump!” So…we did! Daniel flung himself in, Dawn cannon-balled, I jumped, and I have no idea what Anthony did, because he went after me and my eyes were covered in mud. I couldn’t see for a good minute and Anthony had to help me find my way out of the pit.
I am so glad that they had the final team photo station, since we had seen so few photographers out on the course. I love our team photos!
My number was the only one that survived, so we had to take a clear picture of it so that we could find our photos on the website later on.
We hosed off for a good half hour and still had mud everywhere! When I finally found my skin again, my legs were covered in scrapes…
and a few hours later, quite a few bruises!
We were all pretty sore afterwards, but we had a great time! I think we’ll end up doing it again.
Next year – get there earlier, wear tighter shorts, bring a sweatshirt to wear before and after (I was freezing the entire race!), wear clothes I can throw away afterward, and definitely use knee pads.